Gottman Method of Couples Therapy
We have completed levels 1, 2 and 3 of advanced training in the Gottman Method Couples Therapy which is the most comprehensive, evidence-based, and effective therapy available for relationship improvement today. Based on over five decades of research in relationship psychology, the Gottman Method utilizes structured and solution-focused interventions to teach couples practical ways to:
Deepen their emotional connection
Replace negative conflict patterns with positive interactions
Increase intimacy, respect, and affection
Repair past hurts
Rebuild trust
Recover from affairs or infidelity
Adjust to parenthood
Increase sexual satisfaction and compatibility
Create shared goals and values
How it works?
The Gottman Method of Couples Therapy teaches couples proven skills to strengthen their relationships. The therapy process begins with a relationship assessment. This important first step looks at your relationship’s current status across several important domains that are linked to happiness and staying together. We will then tailor your therapy so that it targets the specific areas that have been identified as challenges. Therapy sessions will involve structured exercises that help you and your partner learn new skills and work through the issues as efficiently and effectively as possible.
THE TWO PARTS OF GOTTMAN THERAPY:
Part 1: Relationship Assessment
The assessment phase involves four sessions:
Session 1: During the first session, we will meet with the couple to gather a history of the relationship and provide a basic introduction to Gottman Method Couples Therapy. Both partners will also be asked to complete an online assessment that measures various aspects of relationship well-being after they leave. The assessment will be transmitted to us when completed and we will score and analyze the results to integrate into the treatment plan.
Sessions 2 & 3: We will meet with each partner individually to gather their personal histories and reports.
Session 4: We will reconvene to discuss the results of the assessment. During this meeting, we will provide a recommended treatment plan. Skills training and an initial intervention exercise will also be introduced.
Part 2: Couples Therapy
Once the assessment is complete, couples begin therapy. The frequency and duration of therapy sessions can be adjusted depending on the couple’s own goals and the areas identified for intervention.
Therapy sessions are structured, solution-focused, and skills-based. Couples are provided with handouts and guided through exercises designed to yield efficient results. Many couples feel significantly closer right away while also gaining practical skills they can maintain after therapy concludes.
This is not an unstructured therapy session where you come in with your partner, fight about a number of issues, and leave feeling bad. In Gottman Method Couples Therapy, you are here to learn and practice new skills that will continually move your relationship forward. When old habits like criticism or defensiveness arise, we will intervene so the conversation stays on track. Our goal is to help couples learn and practice new, effective relationship skills that they can eventually use on their own.
Limitations to couples’ therapy:
Gottman Method Couples’ Therapy has been shown to have benefits for couples. It often leads to a significant reduction of feelings of distress, resolution of specific problems, and a stronger relationship. In many cases, it has moved couples from thinking of ending their relationship to recommitting to it in new ways. However, it is important that you also understand the risks involved. Despite the “nuts and bolts” approach of this method, you will be asked to address areas of difficulty in your relationship. As a result, you and/or your partner may experience uncomfortable feelings like sadness, guilt, anxiety, anger, loneliness, and helplessness. Your therapy may also involve recalling unpleasant aspects of your history together and/or individually. Difficulties between the two of you may become temporarily amplified. Additionally, difficulties with people important to you may also occur, family secrets may be disclosed, and despite our best efforts, therapy may not work out well. Couples’ therapy will only be effective in cases where both partners put in a good faith effort to work on their problems and their relationship. Deliberate dishonesty or deceit, unwillingness to introspect and take responsibility for one’s actions, or lack of interest and motivation to engage in the couples’ therapy process by one or both partners will undermine the therapy. Thus, we can make no guarantees about how the therapy process will be for the two of you specifically or what the outcome will be for your relationship. In addition, couples’ therapy is not advisable in the following situations:
If there is active alcohol and/or drug addiction on the part of either or both partners, from either partner’s perspective
If there is serious violence in your relationship, threats by one or both partners that serious violence might occur, or fear of such serious violence on the part of one or both partners
If either partner currently has an untreated major mental illness (schizophrenia, recurrent psychotic depression, or bipolar/manic-depressive illness.) This does not include past, successfully treated psychotic episodes (e.g. post-partum depression with psychosis).
If there is an undisclosed, current affair that you are not willing to disclose (such secrets predict marital therapy failure)
If either partner is currently experiencing suicidal or homicidal thoughts, or has a history of serious harm inflicted on him/herself or another person
Intensive Couples Therapy
We also offer half-day, full-day, and two-day assessment therapy packages for couples who want to move more quickly toward resolving specific issues, achieve significant results in a short amount of time, or whose schedules make it difficult to attend weekly therapy sessions.
Half-Day Express Relationship Assessment
This assessment package is ideal for couples who want to quickly get through the interviews required for the assessment phase of Gottman Method Couples Therapy so that they can more quickly move on to feedback and therapy. The package includes a 90-minute couples history interview, two 50-minute individual interviews (one for each partner), and links to the online Gottman Relationship Checkup Questionnaires.
One-Day Complete Relationship Assessment
This assessment package is ideal for couples who want to complete the entire assessment phase of Gottman Method Couples Therapy, including receiving the results of their relationship analysis, all in one day. Completing this package enables a couple to immediately begin therapy. The package includes a 90-minute couples history interview, two 50-minute individual interviews (one for each partner), analysis of the couple’s Relationship Checkup Questionnaire results, feedback regarding the strengths and challenges of the relationship, and recommendations for therapy.
One-Day Relationship Renewal (Without Assessment)
This one-day session is intended for couples who have already completed the Gottman Method Couples Therapy assessment process and who would like to move quickly through specific issues in their relationship. This can also be a useful session for couples experiencing a crisis who need focused support to address the issue.
Two-Day Relationship Renewal (With Assessment)
Intended for couples who are new to the Gottman Method of Couples Therapy and who want quick results, this two-day package includes the entire assessment phase as well as a full-day of therapy and skill-building. On the first day, couples complete their assessment interviews and during the lunch break the provider conducts an analysis of the relationship based on the results of the couple’s Relationship Checkup Questionnaires and interview information. After lunch, the couple receives feedback on the strengths and challenges of the relationship, as well as recommendations for therapy. Positive interventions aimed at reconnection are provided before the day ends. On the second day, couples participate in skill-building and therapy exercises that are selected to help them make significant progress through their issues in a short amount of time